Last March 31 was mommy's 7th year death anniversary. For now, my memory of her is so vivid, I feel so much guilty for not dwelling on what I remember of her, especially for the last 4 years. During the burial service, I was not even in the right mind to compose a letter to her and recite it in front of the family, the DENR pool and her other friends during the necrological services.

Do you ever get that forced emotion when you'd want to forget the tragic past because it would be emotionally and psychologically tormenting? For the endless times you try to logicize why it happened, you will never know the answers, God in the end will just reveal the cosmic relevance of this unfortunate event. What sense can I make out of mommy's drowning in an inspection project in the river-mountain range? A few people tried to reason out that it probably was foul-play for the project people are hesitant of not letting my mom find out that there was no project being established in the Quirino site but funds are continuously supplied. I'm not sure of the complete project name though...sounded like German-SWAP project.